It has been awhile since I have posted a bloG. It has been awhile since I have started off a bloG with a really generic opening such as, "It has been awhile since I have posted a bloG." Any fucking way, here goes. If I sound grumpy it's because I need head.

I just got back from having to "Spot" people during their Air Force fit test. I didn't have to do anything really. It was cool because it wasn't me doing the running. My twisted mind just watched in glee (why am I using the word glee?) as others struggled and almost puked. Mwhuhahahahaha. I really don't know why I was there. All I did was give a few "Keep going, you're almost there...Good job buddy." Meanwhile in the back of my head I was really thinking, "Puke! Come on do it. Puke so I can laugh at you while you are puking and rub it in your face." Not the puke. I didn't want to rub their face in puke. I just wanted to rub it in that they are exerting themselves while I get to check things off of a clipboard for a minute. Ouch my wrist is sore from that. I will leave the blatant masturbation joke that is staring me in the face alone.

I will have my moment to run soon. I can laugh now though.


I am stoked in knowing that a couple of my favorite comedians, Louis C.K. and Jim Norton, are filming a pilot for a show on HBO. If you have not heard of either one of these guys do yourself and them some justice and check them out. Good comedy needs to be supported and hacks like Dat Phan need to go back to Africa.


What next? Oh yeah, Terry Shiavo. 7 days without food and water now. Is there something I am missing here? If her parents are so concerned, why don't they just take her home, feed her, and water her themselves using a hose? She already has the hole there. Cram a garden hose down there and hook it up to a faucet. For food just invest in a lot of SlimFast. She wanted to be slim in the first place. It is moderately ironic that being bulemic is what got her this way. If she was anorexic , 7 days without sustenance would be a proverbial walk-in-the-park.

I am not that callous. I am sure everything will work out. Everything usually does. If not then that is what someone greater than us wanted. We can't control everything. Not all of us are Jewish.

Segue....

Springtime.

 

It is starting to get nice outside again. Hopefully that means that I will shed this end of winter depression that I have been going through. It has happened the last couple of years. Same time each year. I don't have an insane gene that runs through my family I don't think. I hope it is just something that is weather related. I went to college for psychology I should be able to snap out of the self defeating thoughts that have been running rampant in my head lately. I am having a real hard time though and I don't feel ashamed to admit that I started to see a professional psychologist. I don't want to live my life this way. I used to be the life of every party and everywhere I went. Now I don't want to go anywhere or see anybody. It is not healthy. It is not normal to feel so reclusive.

I don't know why I am sharing this with people. Maybe it is cathartic. Maybe it's a way to let my friends know how I have been feeling. Whatever it is, I just want to be my old self again. I know it is ultimately up to me to make the changes I need to. I have been so God damned un-motivated lately though.

I know I will look at this bloG in a couple of months and be like, "God, you were such a pussy." Fuck, I am looking at it right now and I can already see what a pussy I am.


All right I will snap out of that sappy, I am feeling for myself, soliloquy. I say soliloquy because I know that I am really talking to myself right now and using this bloG as a means of getting things off my chest. Plus I am using it because it is the word that popped into my head and I didn't feel like changing it. Even if it doesn't belong in this context. Or maybe it does. Maybe I am just using words that are out of my vernacular such as the word, vernacular.


I will end this here. I will end before I start to think that I can be an illiterate, literary hero.

Oh, and my brother wrote himself a ticket straight to Hell...

Brandon Young says...


Jesus was a horrible Jew. Most Jews are good at saving pennies, Jesus couldn't even save himself. I think he'd make a horrible Christian, too; he'd be way too narcissistic: "In the name of the Father, ME, and the Holy Spirit...What would I do?"


Much love,

G