There is great news out of Belgium this
week. One of those animal rights nut sacks was eaten by a
Cheetah. As it turns out, prior to being lunch, she was able to
adopt the animal under some kind of special program. In the
program she was responsible for buying all of the Cheetah's food.
Well, I guess she went above and beyond this one.
Apparently she hid inside of the zoo until after
closing time and then found the keys to the Cheetah cage and let
herself in. I have to wonder how smart this woman was.
Adopting a Cheetah isn't like adopting a kid, well; arguments could be
thrown on either side of that issue. But anyway, I don't know if
she decided she wanted to play with the damn thing or what but in the
end she won't have to buy any more Cheetah food. Talk about
irony.
And of course every one of her friends and fellow
animal nuts says that she loved animals. Maybe she was secretly
banging the Cheetah in question; I guess the world will never
know. All I can say is that thankfully there is one less hippy
protester in the world.
By and far it seems that this country and
other countries are starting to be over run by stupid people. In
Britain, it is said that 65% of the Muslim population would like to see
Britain ran by Muslim law. Well, news flash dumbass, your in
Britain not some crappy, women hating third world Arab nation. If
you want to live by Islamic Law then go back to the fucking
desert. Don't move somewhere and expect everyone to change
because of your dumbass. I, like most modern people in the great
Western Nations, love to look at hot chicks wearing next to nothing
while walking around. I see these chicks and I stick them in the
bank. The bank being the vault inside my head that I store my
dirty masturbation pictures.
Something tells me I wouldn't be able to get a hard
on looking at some lady wearing a giant towel and a scarf that smelled
like camel ass. Fuck off.
Speaking of masturbation, the law is getting tighter
on looking into windows. I used to be able to wonder the streets
of a retirement community with one hand down my pants while looking
into old ladies windows. Apparently our Judeo-Christian society
frowns on that. Hey Islam, if you let me peep in windows and jerk
off in public then I’m all for Islamic law.
People aren't taking advantage of the elderly
as much as they used to. Sure Anna Nicole married that Strom
Thurmond look-a-like but she was never able to settle the case before
her tragic death. Tragic my ass, she was just another fat girl
that keeled over because of to much diet medication. The world
will not stop turning.
I think more people need to get out there and
find themselves a nice 70 year old honey with blue pubic hair.
They should bang the shit out of her for a year or two or at least
until her heart weakens enough that at the next sexual escapade it
finally gives out and her flabby ass dies while she attempts to dry
hump you. Even if you don't get that much money, you'll still be
known around the town as the wack job that banged that blue haired
chick. Now that's a win win situation.
Now, I’m not advocating that you
go out and bang a hold bunch of old chicks, I’m just saying there
may be some money involved in it. You never know, the old lady you
marry might turn out to be one of the largest share holders of
Microsoft stock.
So there you have it. Go forth and bang
old chicks and masturbate while looking through windows. If there is a
heaven I believe this is what it would be.