I just got back from my interview for immigration enforcement agent in Philly. This type of interview is graded pass/fail. I passed, like you would guess other wise. So I asked them what's next because the government likes to throw stupid tests in and such after the interview. They told me that after this I just wait for a call with the job offer. So the idea of getting a job offer for this kinda made me think. I thought about the first thing Im going to do if I get this job and this is what I came up with. I will be enforcing immigration laws so the first thing I am going to do is get the Bateman's, on the first floor, sent back to England. They fucking piss me off, always drinking tea, talking with that English accent and ignoring social norms such as going to the dentist(maybe they are autistic). Why do they still have that accent, their family has been here for over 5 generations. Next I'm going to get the Sanchez family across the street booted back to Mexico, those fuckers always got to be cleaning up something in their yard and their grass always looks perfect. How the fuck do they make their lawn so nice especially when their family has owned that house for the past 4 generations, there are always at least 5 kids playing in the yard. Next on to the Cholople's. If any family needs to go back to Africa it is them. I swear I hear them click clicking away at 3 in the morning. I wish I could understand those click clicks because they talk forever and they should know English by now, their family has been in America now since Franklin Roosevelt was in office. Don't think I forgot about the Changs, I truly wish for them to be deported back to Asia. They live right beside me and I swear they are constantly making clothing over there. It sounds like there are 20 sewing machines going all day long. I don't know if that is what it is or not but every month a man in a white suit stops by with Martha Stewart to visit them and that is the only day of the month the "sewing machines" stop for about 20 minutes. I use quotations because I have never seen into their apartment, it is always so dark. Maybe Martha Stewart visits them since their parents came over on the same boat as Martha's parents, Im not sure. Then I am going to straight to the Balanovski's house up the street and shipping them back to Russia. They are always peeping out of their windows staring at everyone and when I pass they come out quickly and try and sell me their daughter. Plus there are always vodka bottles in their trash, damn alcoholics. I have no clue why they are such alcoholic, their one relative is the one who helped start the prohibition movement in 1919. After I get them deported I am heading down to the swamp where the Irwin's live. Those lazy fucks are always drinking Fosters and sitting out on their porch that over looks the swamp. Every once in awhile I see one of them wrestling with a fake crocodile in the swamp. This I do not understand at all because that family has never seen a real crocodile. Hell the last person in that family that probable saw a real crocodile was their great great great great great great great grandfather before he got on that ship to come to America. Well that pretty much sums up who I would like to deport, because who is left? The only one I can think of is Chief This Is My Land but he lives on the outskirts of town on some land the city gave him, too bad it is right next to the landfill. There is no way I could deport him, this is his land. Oh yeah I forgot one person, me. I will have to deport myself back to, well first I would have to find out where my family came from, then I would send myself back there.