It's Dazza!







Oh shit wait that isn't her.




Ah yes this is Dazza, the newest female from MySpace to grace the halls of DamnCrackers.com
This font is too big.
This is better.

So Dazza used to be a playboy model.  As we see this following image I cut and pasted from her MySpace.


I also cut and pasted this next picture, and I enlarged it for an added effect.



So first we see our lovely whore gracing the pages of Playboy.  Then, we see her gracing the kitchen of some poor country folks farm house.  Do you see the contrast?  I hope so, because if you don't this nickname will make no sense to you.  First off you need to understand that we here at DC nickname all of our whores and in that tradition I bring you.


Washed up.

Maybe you don't think that nickname fits her.  Maybe you are doubting my nicknaming ability.  Well let me show you one more picture that will change your mind if you are, in deed, doubting me.



Yes, that is her with Bono.  If that isn't enough to show you she is washed up then you should probably just stop reading.  Unless you don't know who Bono is, then you can keep reading because your life is much better than mine.  That said let's get onto her info.

As always, my comments in black.

SO you want to know about my sexy, funny, huge titty ass.. RIGHT??.  Okay we are stopping right there.  Hugh titty ass?








I hope that is what she means, because that is funny.  Maybe next she will have a huge fake head. Wait, she already does.  Sorry about that.   Back to the info.

Well I guess I'm forced to be serious and talk about ME. Is talking about you ever serious?  Here it isn't.  I mean come on, you have a huge titty ass.

 Even though their is about three fake DAZZA's on this site. I can't get mad though. I think it's cute. Plus the girl looks great and even has a nice ass!!
I wonder if they all have the nickname "washed up", too?  Hopefully they didn't sell out and talk to Green Day.

Well any way where do I start. Some of you may know me from countless car magazine covers and car-shows. Others from national beer ads or movies, commercials, print ads..BLA BLA BLA..
Way to try and cover up the fact that most people probably know you from beating their meat to your pictures in Playboy. Well I guess what I really should have said was they know her from chaffing the shit out of their dick to pictures of her in Playboy, because that is what happens when you beat off to soft core porn.

   I HATE, HATE talking about myself. Yah I'v done alot of gigs. VERY BIG ONES and small ones. To me it's just a gig. I have done everything I have ever wanted to do. And things that I haven't wanted to do, like Dr. Phil.  
Washed up.

I'm happy to say I have no regrets or fears. I find modeling fun and easy. Hell anyone can model. I believe there is a DIVA in all of us. Plus there's always photo shop lol..

You are right, there is always photo shop. Laugh out loud.
 















Here is that amish kitchen again.  Well it could be, except for the alcohol and the first microwave ever invented.  How does she expect people to take her serious if she has a microwave from 1973.  Even my Grandpa has a newer microwave than that and he never even read Playboy, let alone made money from it.    

More info

"I'm going to be honest with you. I love reading other peoples "ABOUT ME". I makes me wonder is it the truth, or what they want you to believe?"
And when I read your info I wondered, is she going to take this WOTW nomination to heart and write a blog about us and cry to her internet friends or is she going to just suck it up and move on with her life.  Oh shit I forgot, she doesn't have a life anymore.  She has lowered her once high standards of being in Playboy down to ones of hanging out with Bono.  That is why she got her nickname; washed up.  So I guess we will be seeing a blog from her sometime soon.
 I know the reason why I'm on this, is to promote my site WWW.DAZZA.COM and other adventures. Like my FANTASTIC STORE on my site.
Well I guess I just gave her free advertisement, but then again who cares.  None of you are going there anyways.  This kind of stuff makes you sick to your stomach doesn't it?  You are all Mormons aren't you?  No coffee for you, or any of Washed Up's nasty soft core porn.
 I HAVE A DVD LINE "DAZZA DEL RIO PRESENTS" The DVD's are Hot Sexy and very Naughty!! I love to find the girl next door and shoot her in the BEDROOM!!! .
YOU MURDERER!  I am calling Sipowicz!


Do whatever you have to do to solve this case.  I will get back to you after this info bit and see what is up with the case.




I love making DVD's and calendars. Especialy movies!! I'm so not a hatter. GIRLS RULE!! If you a Sexy Bitch "I WANT YOU!"

If she isn't a hatter, maybe she is the mad hatter.  Or maybe she is just a stupid bitch that doesn't know how to spell.  You make the call.

I'm always looking for undiscovered talent. So if you know any hot girls please get back to me!!
Yeah I know plenty of them.  Go check them out.

Okay let us get back to Detective Sipowicz.

So Detective, did you solve the shooting?





 
Alright if you say so.  I guess she was just talking about a photo shooting or . . . hey wait.  What is that on your lip?  Oh that is nasty Sipowicz, you went down on her didn't you!   On her nasty Washed Up pussy!  You disgust me.  Go back to making crappy TV shows.











Yeah that was a pretty fucked up move.  They should have cast that Screech guy instead.




So this WOTW is over.  Goodbye and goodnight.
Oh  . . . and alcohol is good, buy our shirts.



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